Saturday morning I got to spend a fun-filled hour in the Emergency Room. Long story short, my heart started racing (around 180 beats per minute) and after 20 minutes we decided we should head in and get it checked out. And of course, 10 seconds after I get hooked up to the monitors my heart slows down, back to normal. Anywhoodles, not the point of the story.
Before anyone hooked up anything to me or gave me any meds, I made sure they knew that, currently, I've got fetuses up in here. The first reaction was always "Wow, that's crazy." Followed immediately by "Where they conceived through fertility treatments?"
Now, I am not ashamed that I got knocked up with the help of 10 other people and a lot of money. I have no issues telling people that we didn't conceive after a romantic night and a bottle of wine. It doesn't mean I love them any less or they are any less "natural" than children who where made that way.
But my first reaction is why in the hell does it matter how these children were conceived? Number one, I was in the ER for MY HEART. I was concerned about what my heart palpitations would do to my peeps, which is why I went in, but there wasn't an immediate threat to any of them (turns out my heart doing that won't affect them at all) And 2. No matter how ANY child was conceived, once it is growing within the mother's body, there isn't a difference between it and a "normally" conceived pregnancy. Of course, a triplet pregnancy is different than a singleton pregnancy, but an IVF triplet pregnancy IS NOT different than a spontaneous triplet pregnancy.
So really, why did it matter to these medical professionals how I made my children? Why are they concerned with whether or not me and the hubs did the hibbity? And beyond the medical field, why is ANYONE concerned with how we make our children? Who cares if they were made in a petri dish, a catheter, a lab, a swamp or the backseat of a car? I doubt they are going to come out with "PETRI DISH" stamped across their forehead. (But side note, can you imagine if every child DID come out labeled as to where they were made? It would make for some interesting stories, I can imagine)
Am I ashamed of this? Hells no. I'm loud, proud and out there. So what if it took me 112 injections to get these guys? But really, why does it matter to other people? Maybe next time someone asks me if they are "natural" I will tell them not only are they natural, but we got them here by doing it doggy-style. Wonder what their reaction would be then? *grin*
I was in the ER last week for a high heart rate too. Did they tell youit wouldn't hurt the babies? I was so worried that my high heart rate could. I just had a little anxiety. Hope you are feeling better.
ReplyDeletehahahahaha, Laughed out loud in the office at the end of that post!! Goodness gracious!
ReplyDeleteI hope your heartbeat stays normal, but it is nice to know that it won't effect the peeps :)
People are just nosy. You are right - it doesn't matter one bit how the babies were made (unless they were checking to see what meds you might still be taking from fertility treatments). Triplets are rare but they do happen naturally - I had friends in grade school that were identical triplets, boys! I love the idea of telling people *exactly* how they were naturally conceived!!
ReplyDeleteThat'd be a great come back. Let us know how it goes. *wicked grin*
ReplyDeleteHahahaha oh please say that next time! Im sure the reaction will be priceless :) Glad your ticker is ok though!
ReplyDeleteI get your frustration, but I think people are just curious. Maybe they too are or know someone who is going thru an IF journey....you never know. I had a singleton pregnancy and always announced she was conceived with help - it was something I was super proud of, but I think I also have a determination to educate fertile myrtles. You will be asked this 18 kagillion more times, so it might be a good idea to figure out a less stressful response. Love ya and glad your heart calmed the hell down....damn!
ReplyDeleteThis made me laugh- lol! I hear ya though Why the HECK does it matter- what is the difference between our babies and others? grrrr....never ending infertility!
ReplyDeleteTriplets or even twins are rare. So people are just curious I think. I don't think in their minds it matters one way or another, but just curious how this miracle happened. In my grandson's kindergarten classes of 60 children there are 6 sets of twins. I'm curious, but in no way whatsoever would I EVER ask. But some people don't have class so you will get asked from now until they are grown. So come up with something you're comfortable with or puts them in their place.
ReplyDeleteHa! I like the doggy style answer :).
ReplyDeleteOoh, doggy style is good. I think I'd say "Girl on top." And then give a good wink.
ReplyDelete"Do twins run in your family?" "Nope!!" (Big smile). That's how I've learned to deal with it. I'm sorry you went into the hospital, that must have been scary. I hate the feeling of my heart racing!
ReplyDeleteI love your attitude. Seeing as my children were conceived with an egg donor and surrogate, I always get, "so who's the mother?" Um, me, duh! I pity some people's ignorance.
ReplyDeletepeople are always gonna judge. don't mind it! you and your hubby did what you had to do. TTC is a struggle with infertility issues. you are where you are now and it is definitely a blessing!!! =)
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